Have you heard from Marina?

That is the question we most often get... and why wouldn't we?  We have shared every step of this journey with you and then we just leave you hanging!  That was not our intent!  We got home, my in laws stayed with us for a couple weeks, we huddled around our little ones making sure they were okay, Halloween came and went, and then we had some time to reflect and just be, for a minute.  Then life got overly busy with Thanksgiving, family, Christmas, family...

As we look back, we were shocked that we could come home from such a spiritual high and be so easily distracted again.  No, it wasn't the outcome we expected, but we were able to walk so incredibly closely with our Savior that we never wanted that part to dwindle - to fade - to become less important.  Yet... it did.  We since learned through our Bible Study Fellowship classes that hard temptation follows spiritual highs.  Like Noah - he comes off the ark after being so incredibly obedient.  He walked intimately with God - followed His counsel to the T, worshiped Him well - yet, not longer after he leaves the ark does he get drunk and lay naked.  Now, I am thankful to say, we didn't respond quite the same way.  :) However, we did fall - we allowed the events of our daily life to come between us and God - He is the only one that is worthy of our time yet we gave it to everyone BUT Him. Thankfully, we have found our way back to daily time with Him!  During that time He has been speaking loud and clear.  He keeps telling me to get on the computer and continue to blog.  Of course, I agreed with Him that it was overdue for me to update the blog but other then that, I am done.  Nope - He is telling me He wants me to keep writing.  What?  I don't like to write.  It is NOT my comfort zone.  It takes time... too much time. It isn't my strength..  And then He so sweetly (hear the sarcasm?) whispered in my ear "where in the world did you get the idea that I was in the business of using people while in their "comfort zone?"  Hmmm... good point.  But really?  Okay - we will start with updating the blog... :)!  He is also sharing with Andy and I that He is about to rock our world once again.

But - before going there, I thought I should answer the question on so many minds... Have we heard from Marina yet?
Yes - we have been in communication with our Marina.  After we got back, we didn't really know what to do... do we write to her?  Do we wait for her to reach out to us?  What is protocol in this situation?  We certainly haven't experienced anything like this before and in all honesty, we don't know anyone who has, so we just waited.  Then I started getting word (it is crazy how small this world we live in is) that Marina was acting angry - dark - without hope.  So, on November 4th, I sent her a long message on Facebook letting her know that we love her - that her decision hasn't made us angry and that she shouldn't be angry at anyone for telling her that they don't agree with her decision.  I shared with her that I was sad, but not mad.  I shared with her how special she is, not only in our eyes, but also in God's eyes.  I shared with her that she is loved and wanted.  A couple days later I got a response - she thanked me and told me that she loved us too.  Initially, I was the one always sending messages to her first and then she would respond.  Now, she is initiating contact.  It always makes my heart beat a little faster when I see a notification that she has sent me a message.  I let her know on December 3rd that we are getting a box together for her... she responds with "thank you mummy i love you".  She certainly knows how to push my buttons and make the tears flow. But I also know that she is fine with her decision and wants to be right where she is.  I am not 100% certain of her motives when she sends me tender messages - does she want something or does she really feel that way.  It doesn't really matter - God has said that while she has computer access and can communicate with me, I am to continue to communicate our love for her and more importantly His love for her.  I can do that.  Since we have been home from Ukraine, I picked up a book by Francine Rivers - Redeeming Love - OH MY!  What a beautiful tangible portrait of how to love like Jesus loves.  Why didn't I read this while she was here over the summer?  Why did God have me read it after I got home?  The answers to these questions won't come (at least not on this side of heaven) but that is okay.  I hear His message for me now... to learn to love her more like Jesus... learn to love everyone more like Jesus.  Is He preparing me for what is next?

To answer the question on many minds - Is she going to change her mind and come to America to become our daughter legally?  We believe the answer is "no"... but that doesn't mean our family doesn't feel like she is part of it.  We pray for her daily - sometimes several times a day... for her salvation... for her protection... to feel God's arms around her making her feel loved and accepted... and much more!  The girls still include Marina in their self made family portraits.  We still hear the girls say out of nowhere that they miss her.  She is still very much loved and prayed for... and will always be.  To us, she will always be Marina Grace Green.

That is the end of this update... and I promise that I will continue to provide updates regarding sweet Marina as they arise.  But it also looks like I am going to be writing a little more frequently on the blog... sharing with you what God is doing in our lives... how He is speaking directly to us... the next big assignment He has for the Green's... stuff like that.  I should warn you now... Andy and I are reading Jen Hatmaker's book, 7, and feel like we are being led to participate in a modified version of it.  I know what you are thinking... what is Karin up to now.  Yep - He is leading us down another path to help us draw closer to Him.  What Andy and I are wondering is what in the world is He preparing for us.  He is about to shake things up again... show us how far away we really are from what He is asking for us as Christians to be. And more... is He asking us to adopt again?  I don't know yet - but we know He is preparing us for something.  We are both scared and excited as to what that looks like yet.  But as Jen Hatmaker put in her  book (she quoted from a friend of hers) - "Obedience isn't a lack of fear.  It is just doing it scared."  Amen sister!  There is something powerful in being scared in obedience... it creates a dependence on God that we just don't routinely experience.

As stated above, I will continue to write... I would love for you to join me for the roller coaster ride that our Savior has us riding on.  (For the record, I do not like roller coasters... at all!  And I don't always like the ones God puts me on either - but one thing I know for sure - the safest place to be is in His will, even if that means riding the biggest one at the park!)  One of the first things on the list will be our modified version of 7.  If you have read the book and wanted to try it out but haven't because you didn't have an accountability partner, join us.  If you haven't read it but have the heart/desire to be more like Jesus, buy the book and join the fun (I use that term loosely!) We are still in the process of reading it ourselves and will bathe it in prayer to see how God wants us to lay it out.  Yes, I have already heard Him say that we would be doing a modified version... at least I think that was Him talking!  :)
More to come...
Love,
Karin